Fatih. Fertility. Family
I know it’s a secret we all try to hide so that the world thinks that we have it all together.…
When in truth, we are all operating in our own unique 3-ring circus crazy beautiful shit show!
I used to hate when mothers would talk about the seasons of motherhood.
It’s just a season, they would say…
I would roll my eyes!
But I get it now.
Because the dark winter I am just coming out of was a brutal one.
I did everything I could to escape it over and over again.
And many times, I thought I had.
The sun would begin to shine…
Things in my life would feel like they were blooming…
Only to again be hit by the bitter cold and 3 feet of snow.
Over the last 3 years, I feel like I lost my way as a mother.
Or maybe I did not lose my way so much as I forgot who I was.
Several months ago, I completed my breastfeeding journey with sweet Tallula.
She was two and a half.
I can see now that what I’ve been navigating was very much tied to my postpartum journey.
The postpartum period does not end at 6 to 8 weeks when you are expected to go back to work.
I mean it takes 9+ months to grow a baby!
The truth is the postpartum experience can last for years especially if you are still nursing.
Life as a mama at times is hard!
Really, really hard!
I need to say that more.
I need to acknowledge that raising kids is hard.
And there are definitely seasons!
I am happy to share that I THINK spring is finally here.
The sun is beginning to shine.
I’m breathing deeper.
My mind is clearer.
I trust that God is taking care of my children so I don’t need to worry so much.
And God has been blessing me with new friendships.
Today, my heart feels full!
Today, motherhood feels manageable.
Today, I am okay.
Tomorrow is another day, and I await the honor of meeting with sunrise with open arms as I try my best to find the magic in the messiness of what the day will bring!